Christmas Junk 13th Floor Vending

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100_3815.JPG13th Floor Elevators. 13Th Floor Vending Machine. 13th entry in the Christmas junk series. We're in the quickening. When Highlander 2: The Quickening came out, it was Siskel and Eberts' worst movies and also made their top 10 worst films for the year. Maybe the "quickening" was a buzz word for all about 5 minutes in the 80's. It made it into a lyric of a Grateful Dead song. I believe it was Gene Siskel that was laughing really hard about the title of the movie. He just found it so amusing. As a writer and a critic, he probably felt like it was nonsense or gibberish. It was like Ally G interviewing Andy Rooney...that racialist. So, what the hell is this? Is it for the quickening?

100_3817.JPGWhat's this? A doggy? Surprise! We'll get to the beer cans later. Right now we gotta talk about this bit of cute. Look at how that bread tie is tied around in such a way that makes this decoration hang up on the tree. What we have here is a dog of no fixed hairstyle. His tail is on a spring so it wags. He's got a red collar. His tongue is happily out of his mush. What can he be happy about? Is he going to get on with The Quickening? *dun dunnn*

100_3814.JPGThere's a little doggy symbol at the top. There's also a bit of dust. Do you suppose the dust came from THE QUICKENING??  Nahhhh. This came from a Hallmark Christmas Ornaments display at a participating Kohls.  If I were a dog, I'd be excited about finding this magical machine right smack dab in the QUICKENING! Of course, I would seemed to have lost my pockets! (Skitch. Loose Shoes. Thanks.)

100_3812.JPGTadaaahhhh. This is another piece of crap that I also bought a duplicate of for Boomer. He loves this crap, but the previous post already talked about that. What's wrong with liking "Doggie Delites" In a Vend-Dog-Matic. This is another Christmas ornament that resides next to the Dr. Duck can.  A bone. A tennis ball. A slipper. A disc from the episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation where everybody gets hooked on an alien game that is really a mind control device and Wesley Crusher saves the day. Time warp. Quickening. A rolled up newspaper. A cuddly wuddy teddy bear shat out by Radar O' Riley. The picture obscures the doggie treats and the hot dog. Then you see the tug toy. Oh yeah, Paul Lynde is in the center square! "Oh these doggie treats, they are terrible with human teeth. A little grainy, but wonderful in a martini." No, maybe it's Bruce Valanche on the Whoopiwood Squares. " I love writing lame jokes for awards shows and I love to eat lots of bones. I like Milkbones too! Ha! I'm the second coming of William Gaines!"

Wow. Now I'm reaching. Isn't this KEYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTE? -Ric