Just like a 30 cent "Data Center Deluxe" , this is the first of my smaller junk that I put randomly in a bag for, well I don't know why. But, it makes for a good post about small crap in my junk box. Come along with me on this post to the junk blog wary junk blog readers. Ahhh, but I know what is peeking all your interests. First up....
POT WALLET! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Meh. You see I was a member of this very union. Had to leave because they caught me making a pair of jeans out of the crop. This was a flea market find, or could you tell? I like these kind of wallets as mentioned before on this blog, but this one I couldn't bear to carry. Nowadays, maybe if I lived in WA or Vegas... But here in Ohio... Yes Officer, here's my license... no I haven't been using, honest...okay I'll turn down the Grateful Dead and wait while you use SCMOTTS (or whatever the hell they called it in the Blues Brothers.)
I have a sealed deck of the kind of cards they would give you if you ask for it when you flew in the 80's. You know, when they didn't charge you for everything including the pay toilet. I'll get to those in another blog entry. Now, I gotta focus on the "TV Magic Cards". They sold the crap out of these on television as UHF started to take off and become rerun heaven. Funny how they don't advertise these on the new digital rerun happy sub channels. Everything old is new again.
I guess "Marshall Brodien" was some sort of famous magician. Hmmm. I don't remember him being able to make the Washington Monument disappear. Maybe he had something to do with making Al Capone's vault contents disappear in front of a hope filled Jeraldo. I think he showed Rocky how to pull a rabbit out of a hat but it was a lion. Personally I thought that was a better trick than the rabbit. That wacky Bullwinkle. No, I don't know if he was really popular although he seemed very smart dressed in that cape. He sold these cheap decks by the millions and I thought I could be a skilled magician if I got a set. Yes, I wanted to be a magician for a minute, but only if I could suddenly be rich and famous and make money appear.
Ahhh, but to be a good magician, you had to be a good bullsh*tter. I wasn't. Was your card the 9 of spades? Funny, there's seems to be a mix up with the deck. Maybe they sent me a bad one. Of course, if you like the Howard Stern show...126.96.36.199.188.8.131.52.9. My professional life is at a NOIN! (Skitch, Baba Booey and Sour Shoes, Thanks.)
Washington DC. One of the best trips I ever took. When I was a shaver, I survived a car accident and when healed, my mom took a piece of the settlement money and took us to Washington DC. We got to see where Lincoln was shot, had a delicious Caesar salad made fresh right in front of us, drove around in a smelly tour bus for two stops until my mom hired a private driver to take us around and see the real sights. We had lunch in the belly of congress and rode the underground tram. My brother met John Glenn. We stayed in two separate hotels that had the fire alarm pulled. The limo had backwards facing jump seats. I remember the carpets in congress on the steps were great for giving static shocks to whomever touched me if I was touching the railings. This was the beautiful photo book we got as a memory of our trip. That is the memory dump. It's why I remember the trip, my first and the best. Oh yes, and the Cleveland airport was under construction back then and never seems to be NOT under construction. Do not spill your little pearl like candies on the tile airport floor, mom won't let you pick them up and eat them.
"Hey Group! Cool It Ova Dey"
He's the one, the only, Ernie Anderson. For three years in Cleveland, he was TV's Ghoulardi. When televisions were becoming more of a regular entertainment value, the time was right for a late night movie host to capture all of Cleveland. There was an 80% drop in crime when he was on. I never saw him, but I knew of him because he started a late night Friday tradition that became the longest running local show in the history of TV. He was but the beginning, and Big Chuck and Little John ended it. He became more "famous" as the guy with the biggest line in the history of television.. "Tonight, on a very special LOOOOOVEEEE BOAT"" This was the gathering around a Cleveland tradition. A con that lasted a few years. They showed a simulated "Ghoulardi" show with "The Brain That Wouldn't Die" with cut ins of the only footage saved of Ghoulardi caught on film. It was too damn expensive back then to film/tape every show. When I was working in Louisville, they brought in a new boss. I heard he was from Cleveland. To break the ice, I asked him if he knew what "Hey Group, Cool It Ova Dey" meant. That began a great friendship.
Builders Square Sku Pads. When we sold the customer a bit of lumber or a flat of flowers, if the customer wanted to keep shopping, we would write down the "Stock Keeping Unit" on a SKU pad and give it to the customer. We had tons of these things laying around. I used the backs of them to write write write and keep myself from going insane from boredom while working in that tiny garden center register building. At least they didn't make me stock the plants or fertilizer. Next to it was the literature they gave us when we began offering "GE" extended warranty at Northeast Appliance. Actually, it was the best program we had. It didn't pay much, but the plans were complete and reasonably priced. They didn't have a 10 year tube warranty parts only for $9.99 or other "shifty" offers. Ahhh, but I didn't like selling the crap anyway. One funny thing I found written in this book. My manager would always ask me if I also got this with every sale I made.....
"Did You get the BEEF on that washer/dryer set?" "Did you know I flew copters in NAM?" "I see you're eating some chippie dippies"
Here was something a bored kid in junior high school did to try and pass the time. With scrap paper he cut and stapled himself a stupid little note keeper. I did a lot of these and put "many" features into these. Mostly they were meant to mimic spy stuff. I had communicators and flash lights and chemical sets and self destruct computers and transformation spells. It all cost thirty cents. Who's buying?
Finally, a blast from the past. There used to be a video playing device called a "Laserdisc" player. These were huge mirrored record sized discs that played on newly designed "Laser" players. They didn't wear out, but they could only hold 45 minutes a side so you had to "flip" your movie half way through. They had great analog video and amazing "digital" like sound. Yes, these were around a year or two when someone said "Hey, we'll miniaturize these and put 66 minutes of digital audio on it, and it will never wear out." They called it a "compact disc". The rest is blooper giggling history. I was a big "They Might Be Giants" fan before their "Flood" album brought them to a more mainstream audience. My friend Bill was a HUGE fan and the guy that got me into Laserdiscs. He had one of the first VCRS and has the FIRST commercially available Sony CD players. So, for him , for Christmas, I ordered a mini LD of "They Might Be Giants" from the biggest Laserdisc reseller in the country, Ken Cranes. It was so big for a few years, it was their name. I guess Ken Crane sold electronics but they cornered the market on Laserdisc software. Of course, I could have purchased "Termiantor 2" on LD, but it was probably a porn parody of Terminator 2. Ahhhhh, the days of analog, catalog based ordering just seems so quaint. Junk Blog. -Ric