Results tagged “MASH”

Reg-U-Late-Tor

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100_4219.JPGWhat the hell is this? "Converts 120 VAC to 12VDC". Micronta? Red Led?  Sure I know. A man built this! It's a power supply!  Where'd it come from? What was it used for? Do I have any other stupid questions before I give up the answer? I'll provide you a question. How come all the cheap meatballs available frozen always taste like dookie and only the better ones cost a ton of money? Oh yeah, because there's MEAT in REAL MEATBALLS. What the hell is in those cheap meatballs? Do you make a meatball from "mechanically separated chicken, pork and beef"? Mom used to make them from ground beef and garlic. No bread crumbs, no egg. Hunts sauce. She must have used an egg bath to hold them together, but no stuffing at all. Even when we were so poor that my brother was stealing the last piece of American cheese from the bread in my lunch, mom made un-stuffed meatballs. . Maybe I just need to cook real food rather than using the microwave to resurrect Bologna balls from the depths of the freezer. 

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In a nice steel box. With a real appliance switch. Paint job in that crinkled paint that was used on tools and heavy equipment. So, back when I was heavy into Citizen's Band radio, I used my radios in my car and that was that. 12V was cigarette lighter stuff. The only way to use something that was set up for 12V in the house, was to get a converter if it didn't have one built in. Most CBs didn't. Oh sure, there were base stations and other radio equipment but they were way beyond my pay grade back then.  Even this was costly. I think it was sold for $35, which when you were earning "triple gold" 25 hours a week 3.45 an hour (after 6 months) , it was a bit of an expense. I spent it so that I could talk on the CB to a nearby friend when he wasn't allowed to talk on the phone. He bought the very first portable Sony CD player and kept a quiet library of CD's but his parents would hear none of it. He had some strict parents. He must have a lead lined bedroom to be talking to me on the CB, or his parents thought he was praying... to a guy named Trapper and to the truckers on Ch. 19 from the nearby freeway.

100_4223.JPG That was my CB name. Trapper. It was also my Photon name. I guess I'd taken a liking to the name Trapper. Did I trap anything? Nope. Did I keep anything? Lots of stuff on this junk blog. Did I work in morning radio for years on a adult contemporary station in Cleveland? No. Was I from MASH? That's where I got the name. Did I ever get really good at Photon? Nope. Was I ever the top player at Photon? Nope. (Oh yeah, Photon was the first laser tag game and it was played on a sound stage similar to the catacombs of Star Trek: The Next Generation except in base grey rather than 80's pink and aqua.)  I forget what my friend's CB name was. You needed a fake "handle" if you were on the radio. Now, my friend Boomer would have something to say about this message on the bottom. "No user serviceable parts...blah blah blah" A lot of the CB peeps that had base stations at home usually did HAM radio and if you were a HAM likely you knew your way around the soldiering iron. Boomer BUILDS this stuff.

He recently replaced the blown caps on a cheap digital TV converter that I bought from a thrift store for four bucks because it had the remote. (How worthless are those boxes if they don't have the remote to operate them.) He also built his AM carrier current radio station. (Legal. Uses the wires that bring power to your home to broadcast for a few blocks.) His home TV was upgraded to 32" LCD after he picked one up from the trash and fixed the power supply. Okay, enough about repairs. I learned how to soldier when I worked cookie cutter repairs on CRT monitors for a few months. I still can't tell an OHM rating on a resistor. I guess I'm a user as well.

100_4222.JPGThis was cheap tech, but it was damn good tech. It still works. As it did, as it does. It still has the plastic wrap that protected the back side from scratching. Better yet, it was a bunch of electronics MADE IN THE USA! Made in 1984. Made in the good 'ol USA! I would have thought sure it was made in Taiwan by then.  The only thing bad about this is you had to buy two jacks for the power outlet. I think later they were screws. When you wired up some speaker cable to output these jacks, hooked them to the wires of your CB, it sang! It powered two years of CB use until I lost interest and well, haven't used it since. So really, I don't know if this still works, but with the components it was made from, likely, it still works like a charm. It's outdated as hell now. With discrete chips doing all the work of these massive components nowadays, anything that's meant for 12V use only works on regular power for as low as $2. I have several that convert my Sirius and radio transmitters to home use for nothing in the size a little bigger than a 5V power adapter. Technology moves on. Junk Blog never sleeps.

-Ric

 

Where The "No! T Foot" Saga Continued

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100_4398.JPGI love me some thrift shops. I didn't buy this for this junk blog, but I bought this for personal reasons. Make no mistake, it is junk. But, to a kid that grew up making tapes on this damn thing, when I found one in near perfect condition, I had to buy it. "No! T Foot" was actually recorded on my first GE tape recorder which was this very machine without the silver speaker screen or the built in microphone. I had my tape recorder at a friend/babysitters house and being a kid, I had to record myself letting a hot and beefy "wind" fly. So, because it had a wired microphone, I positioned myself on the fabric covered recliner in such a way to "Dutch oven" the microphone and let my gas come out. Keep in mind, I was paying attention to the exclusive fidelity of my ass flaps as it resonated a small but powerful "Ferrrrrrt".  I was that age. I just created a masterpiece of audio wizardry.

I didn't realize, that back in the days when parents spanked their kids when they did something stupid, my friend had done something to offend his mom. Therefore his mom responded with a good swift open handed spank to his rear. He let out a horrified "NO!" then you heard the SMACK. When I played back the tape, I was thinking that I had a $1000 pinpoint highly efficient condenser microphone because it caught the "punishment" at the exact time I "punished" the microphone. Thus, I created the code "No! T Foot". It sounded like someone shouting NO then you hear a sharp smack which sounds like "TCCCH" and then my wind was "Frrrt" , which said fast, sounds like FOOT.  Only on the junk blog will you get a two paragraph explanation of something so insignificant yet, very lasting...to me.

100_4402.JPG This is essentially identical to my first GE from the back. The microphone wire had given way and didn't work well despite splices and speaker wire replacements. Plus, I used it so much, the play button had worn through the plastic "stop" and would not stay down. I had to do surgery on it and jam a marker in the place where the play button was to get it to play. I had moved to a different city and had new friends and one of them had this unit that he really didn't use. I think I paid him $5 for it, which was a TON of money to me, but it was easier to record tapes with the microphone on the unit itself. 

100_4399.JPGI mean everything was the same. You still had to manually release the Kracken and the space that said "IC" covered up where the microphone is on this unit. I learned all about "Auto Level" using this tape recorder. There would be no more "No! T Foot" with this one. I'd have to sit on the machine, ahhhh but I was a feather weight back in the day. You see, when you were recording a silent area and then had a loud noise, the ALC (auto level control) would freak out and boost the volume of what it was trying to record, then it would "jump an audio cliff" when the noise started again. Lots of my tapes made on this have all sorts of split second distortions caused by this. Of course, this was a cheap tape recorder, and it didn't have any way to either turn off the ALC or manually control it. I couldn't complain, the play button WORKED and wouldn't double as a highlighter.

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FEED ME CERTRONS FROM ZAYRE OR SIM/RAINBOWS FROM K-MART!!!!!

We used to go to a Zayre in Elyria and that's where I got the orange Certron C60s (30 minutes a side) in the three packs for about a dollar. Again, when I was really young, that was a TON of money, but I had to have them. When they ran a silly deal on them like buy one get one free, I begged mom for the buck so that I could feed the monster and make noise into my stupid tape machine. I did parodies of SNL's Weekend Update having Jane Curtain and Dan Aykroyd at the news desk and my own "Dan Killy" as the on the street reporter. I taped off of a GE B&W TV many tapes of the "Hoolihan and Big Chuck" (Later Big Chuck and Little John) show.  When I moved near the lake, I was near the first K-Mart I ever went too and they had "SIM" tapes that were cheaper than "Rainbow" tapes, but I got them both so I could record parodies of G98's G-Team In The Morning Show and theme songs from TV shows like Delta House (Animal House in short lived TV format.) I'd seen these devices that actually recorded television programs where you could watch the program over and over on your TV rather than just listening to the static created by recording it from the speaker.... It was the early 80's. They were refrigerator sized boxes that cost a million dollars. Ahh, but I could revisit the audio of  "a very special episode of M*A*S*H" all I wanted in Certron fidelity. 

100_4401.JPG Yep. It was the same. I had an electric adapter for these GE recorders twice, but the wires would always go bad within a year. I remember when I got this GE, I asked for the really expensive NICAD batteries and charger for this so I wouldn't burn through another set of silver Eveready general purpose batteries. I got I think they were "Dynacharge" batteries, and well, they were lumps of coal by the time I couldn't use them anymore. They got used up for sure. Plus, I then asked for an AM/FM tape recorder that you could plug in! No more of those batteries. No more adapters! My Mom took me to the K-Mart but they didn't have the one that I wanted in stock, so I got the McDonald Instruments tape recorder with the fancy power meter. If you've been reading this blog, you know I have only the power meter to show for that POS.  http://ricochet.boomerthedog.net/blog/junk/2015/07/macdonald-industries-finest.html  I'd completely forgotten about this tape recorder until I found it in the thrift store. Now I gotta edit  that  previous post. Damn. More work. I need a beer. Junk Blog. -Ric

Butt Catcher Made In The USA

100_4390.JPGIn my previous Junk Blog entry, I said that "Next Up, paper thin and roll up. It's coming." Well, for those of you that got your bowls and stash out and had your stoned excitement up to another 4:20 indulgence, chill further. I was talking about the future of television. When I talked about the past, wow. A new sub bub club TV channel we have deep on the free TV digiworld is the Heroes and Icons network. It's a "sister" of the METV subnet that shows old TV shows and brought back "One hour done pass, done watch two episodes of MASH." (Ice Cube, Skitch, Thanks.)  So this H&I channel has the rights to all 5 Star Trek series plus the cartoon! Booooooo! What's next, reruns of Gilligans Planet?

"Skipper! I've got an asteroid up my ass!"

"That's okay little buddy, we'll have Josie and the Pussycats in OUTER SPACE take it out."

"Awww, I was kind of hoping for The Far Out Space Nuts to help out, that Bob Denver is always...um...wait...Skipper, will we implode if one character takes an asteroid from the ass of another character played by the same person? What if Maynard from Dobie Gillis wants to get in on the asteroid ass getting?"

"No, don't worry little buddy. Nobody is going to take an asteroid from your ass. They have creams to help you. In the pharmacy aisle."

So, as I was saying, Star Trek: Voyager, the "doctor" was using what looked to be a HUGE laptop and they had IPHONES with Blackberry buttons. Even Next Gen was more advanced... Oh the Geekery. I know, what the F is the point of this blog entry? Oh right! Whirlpool. For all your Kenmore needs. In The 80's and 90's that is. Did you know Kenmore never made nothin? Bingo! It's a name stuck on stuff by a RETAILER! They did have some great tools under the Craftsman name, but we're talking a place to place your BUTTS. This is that place!

100_4391.JPGIt's an ashtray. It's made from the metal they use to stamp products from. It's gen-u-wine Whirlpool. See, when I started at that radio station in Toledo,  they would have radio station sponsored "nights out".  One of their best, rowdiest nights was at a bar in Findlay, Ohio across from the Whirlpool manufacturing plant. Since my radio station had a good signal into town, we would had a night out where all from the radio station could pile into the radio stations van, wearing station swag, to represent in the far reaches of Findlay. Nevermind that previously I'd been turned down for a gig by the station I was working for, in a letter signed by my boss. That same boss eventually was desperate enough to hire me. I was also turned down at a station in Findlay. (If at first you don't succeed, puke all over the city that didn't hire you while working for the city that did.)

So, once at this bar, we were all treated to a shot of Yaaaaaaaaaagermeiiiiiiister. Now, I was sober at this point, and I made reference to the fact that I LOVED THE ASHTRAYS! They had them every five feet on the bar, plus at every table. I guess I kept saying that. Fixed on the fact that in a former career path "I sold a TON of Whirlpool dishwashers, they sold like hot cakes, They sold better than any brand we had. They are the BEST.  I want one of these ashtrays! HOLY HELL! WTF IS THIS COUGH MEDICINE I'VE JUST INGESTED? "

Of course, the shots kept coming, along with beers and well, that spelled out DOOM AND GLOOM for this radio fudd. Why didn't somebody tell me that this "new to me" liquid I was ingesting had very dark results. Thankfully, we had the plastic buckets filled with cement to put the radio station tent up. When coming back, they propped me up against one of them and I not so gladly gave back my evening's drinkings. We even stopped at a 24 hour wand wash place to "clean out" my artwork. It's all fun and games until someone pukes. Ahhh, I do remember it was more a celebration, because the newbie spewed. It's the way radio used to be, before it sucked.

100_4389.JPGSo, I did remember that I made it home at some point. That I was in fact gifted a gen-u-wine made in America Whirlpool ash tray from the owner of the bar and I proceeded to speak of it on the morning show I produced.  I had to thank the generous, but more important, MEA CULPA to those that endured the ride back with yakky the yakmeister who made a "famous kids pizza" restaurant sorta smell. This thing I'll always have in my heart as a reminder never to drink Yaaaaaaaaagerrrrmeiiiister. It did become the favorite drink of a famous president when I did my lame "sounds like X doing Y doing this famous president" imitation during my college radio Gush Limbarge (fat guy imitating fat guy) radio show. I would have never known of this beverage and it's magic qualities to bring up whatever contents you may have had in your stomach if it wasn't for the rock and roll dishwasher plant workers in Findlay and the fun radio station "toss your cookies" game. Win no cash and a WHYOHTEE shirt.

-Ric

Junk Cameras Three (Vivicheese)

DSCI0526.JPGThe box of crap cameras comes to a close with three of the crappiest pieces of crap ever minted in the name of discount photography. Vivatar products in the 80's and 90's was the bottom of the cheese barrel in point and shoot cameras. I mean, they had a name, were sold by everybody, were cheap and at least those cheapy point and shoot FILM cams managed to take acceptable photos. Ahh, but all you needed was LIGHT. If you got a decent quality film, had decent processing and were in light, even the cheapest cameras could produce at least "acceptable" photos. Hell, I used a Vivitar camera for years. (...or was that Ansco? It may have been. I think it's an earlier blog.) Anyhell, Vivitar graduated into the digital world and well, with some sharpening, these would make "acceptable" photos. But when you can get a used Kodak for $3 that takes incredibly sharp pics with no post processing needed. Get the Picture? (Thanks Hawkeye. Just saw him say that on the MeeeeeTeeeeveeee.)

IMG_0142.JPGVIVICHEESE 3635 2.1 2 "AA" BATTERY SD CARD 

Actually, this camera does not seem so bad for it's age. It seems better than my old Cintar camera. It has a view finder. It has a separate LCD readout for status. I got this one from a thrift shop with a SD card in it. The door was broken, but a little tape helped.  It seemed like the terminals may have been dirty because I couldn't get this to fire up in the car. I tried putting the chip in another camera, but it didn't seem to work. So, It would wait until I got home.

IMG_0143.JPGSee, all the features on this. Of course, with the LCD display and only 2 AA battery power, it was likely a power hog. So, I put it in my cleaning machine and it powered up and I managed to take a few blurry pics with it. A clunky interface and I'm not sure that if batteries had leaked into it, the camera itself wasn't affected by it. You could set this for "Super Fine" which I'm sure helped out when this was new. It shut off by itself a few times, and after resetting and trying again, I gave up.

PICT1705.JPGHere is the best picture I could get. It's a picture of a picture I have on my wall of a Boomer The Dog original/parody of a free rag cover from Pittsburgh. The Vivicheese picture of the picture is just the cheese that this camera, in it's condition, could produce. Benefit of a doubt to age and treatment, but I'm bitter because...read on... (Oh yes, and that SD card, an "8G" SDHC card was not that at all. It was an 8 MEG card. No wonder why I couldn't save squat to it. It would have worked if it was a Smart Media card and I wanted to take 640x480 pictures.)

100_3513.JPGVIVIPOODLESQUIRT 3.3 2 "AA" BATTERY SD FIXED FOCUS

The dung continues. This one looks like any number of cameras put out in the mid 00's . Slim profile, slide opening. Almost like several Olympus cams and other cameras of note. This one has a viewfinder that seems like something a pro camera would have. It's tinted so when looking into white, it appears purple-ish.  Because it's fixed focus, it's got a tiny switch on it to set for macro or long distance, whatever.

100_3515.JPGSee? It's the same as any other camera. I did think this would take pretty good photos. I did. Hopeful I am. The reviews of this camera vary from "okay" to "poo". The menus were easy to operate and as with all later cams, there was no LCD for data.

IM000005.JPGActually, maybe I could use this camera in a pinch. If I was at the beach where I would worry about getting sand in the lens or I wanted to take blur master at a cheaper cheese price. No, it's not very good. Decent enough colors on this, one of my typical "I gotta try this cam to see how the pictures stand up" pictures. Gee, I still use video tape? Here I am doing a blog about junk and...well...yes, I still use video tape. Leave me alone. You take pictures with your cell phone. Why should you care? The colors are good on this picture though right?

100_3543.JPGVIVIBLUR X024 "10.1" 3 "AAA" BATTERY SD FIXED FOCUS


This was the first Vivicheese camera I added to my collection. It needed a HC SD card. It was a 3 "AAA" battery camera. Turns out the thin piece of paper that is the battery door was broken but managed to hold in the batteries so this could work. It is also fixed focus, so you can turn the lens to macro by a switch on the side. This really seemed like a perfect camera to keep in my car. It was so slim and would take bigger pics and if it got five-fingered from my glove box, I'd be out $3. All In.

100_3544.JPGNow, I think Vivitar had a good idea. A thin camera that took normal batteries. There was no rechargeable battery with a speciality charger to mess with.  Look at the size of the screen. Menus were easy to use. You could put this one in your pocket and snap pictures of your balls. I said it. Troubles set in when you breathe on the battery door, or at least sit the camera down with the slightest force. Then, all that screen needs a lot more power than can be delivered by AAA batteries. I bought a cheap set of AAAs when I was on the road so I could take some demo pictures. I may have gotten 15 when the batteries quit, and that's after I messed with this camera to even get it to take pictures. The SD card I put in it showed off pics taken with other cameras very nicely. I still thought of this camera as something for my car. But...

IM000010.JPGAnother demo picture. Yes, I have a stuffed sheepdog wearing a Cumberland Brews tee shirt with a blue beanie style dog next to it and a flipped over Yuengling beer cap while sitting in a directors chair. You see it every day on every blog. It may appear to be something of a picture, but it suffers from every other cheap cheap generic camera. Terrible over exposed or under exposed, blurry or washed out photos when taken inside. You know, when Boomer first got his netbook, the camera inside took pictures that were kind of like this, except they were completely washed out. He took the housing apart and lo and behold, the original plastic lens cover was still on it when it was assembled. I gotta think these were mass assembled and may have had same issue. Trouble is, this took a pretty decent outdoor picture. Still, couldn't take with if I was without a cam, so into the box it went. 3 AAA batteries is no way to power a camera. I've been there and done that and got the Cumberland Brews tee shirt.

-Ric

100_4060.JPGIt's one of what I think are the all time rap lyrics ever. Ice Cube from the excellent album "Death Certificate". He talks about being shot and being sent to the county hospital where it's a wait. So while he's sitting there bleeding in the waiting room... "One hour done pass, done watch two episodes of Mash."  I gotta wonder what episodes they were? Something with Wayne Rodgers as Trapper?

The reason why that lyric hit me is, well, it's how Mash was when I was growing up. It was the most popular syndicated show for a few years and filled that 7P-8p time slot five days a week, even before the new episode would come on. It made Mash so popular that the network would have let it run as long as they wanted. The actors agreed to do a smaller season 11 with a good wrap up movie and that was that. Then a few years ago, netlet METV started airing them where I grew up with them. 7-8 PM. Of course, I had the first three seasons already, when they came out on DVD, but didn't have the others. I completed them within a weekend. Yeah, a few in those slim cases but what do I care?

100_4017.JPGAhhh, but lets go back a bit to when I was a stooge walking around my high school as the nard that wore a paper dog costume and got a tootsie roll placed under my seat in my "remedial" American history class. I forget why I wanted to try out my acting chops in a school play. Someone pushed me I guess, maybe a teacher? I know I took acting class, but that was to get an easy grade. We had to do the "Wizard Of Oz" and I attempted to play the "loin" and made a costume that was half as*ed and because I didn't know a damn thing , I just stapled the fake fur together and expected it to hold while we all ad-libbed our lines for lack of actually rehearsing. There is a tape of it that I'm sure was kept somewhere in case any of us became big stars.

Gee, why would they want a shrub like me to be in a real play viewed by real parents? Why? I think the person who pushed me into it was someone that knew I was a born natural for a role. The role of Radar. I must have looked like radar in a way and certainly had me pegged as a guy that would carry a teddy bear. Yes, we had a tall bill to fill. Great writing, great acting, great fake war sets, and we had to live up to it without any of that. I tried out, and I got the part. 

100_4019.JPG Of course, what got me was the try out poster. The truck with the lips. You see, my local station WUAB Ch. 43, had purchased a animation package to promote their shows. The one for Mash, after they ran a few highlights for the show would wrap up by going to a smaller picture. They had the WUAB logo and the time, and the above truck with lips would start rolling and then animate the lips to a kiss and keep rolling. It was all silly poop, but you know someone was a fan of those logos. I don't remember if they were still airing at the time. 

I was in with the theatre crowd. I got exclusive use after hours of the theatre "den" which was a flop lounge that we could hang in after school with cheesy couches and a real working phone. We did have rehearsals which were fun. We had a party to watch the original MASH movie because the play was based on the movie not the TV show, so we had "Painless Polish" and "Ho John" and other assorted characters that made it into the first season but faded away. I don't think you could buy every episode of the TV show on VHS tape at the time either, so we were at the mercy of watching reruns. We had the run of the middle school's theatre and rehearsed there since our high school didn't have a theatre other than the practice classroom. About the only other thing I remember is, getting a ride to the theatre rather than walking the distance to it. A senior at the school with the first name "Dudley" drove a beat up yellow Renault "Le Car" which used to have "Le Car" done in striping on the doors. With all of the anti rust body work on it, Dudley painted "DUD" just before "Le Car". That's right, I drove around in the DUD LE CAR.

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Dates were set. We had our mission. We'd put on two shows and have a few run rehearsals  before to make sure we had the entire play down. I had never acted before so I got a few pointers from the instructor. It's all about "Project", but since I was also in choir for the easy credits, I was pretty good about forcing my voice but without sounding forced. There was also some stage direction. Being as how I wasn't too good with my lefties or my righties,  I struggled a bit there as well. Then there was memorising my lines. Actually it was easier than I thought, and it was easy to ad-lib if someone else blew a line. Then the most valuable tip was "you're acting too much, be yourself..." I was trying to hard and it was making me nervous. I could have used a fifth of jack and a spleef. I chilled like a bin full cheeseburgers. I could do the role. I was Radar.  I remember going to Spencer gifts to buy a pair of "John Lennon" sunglasses. Without the lenses, they would work as Radar glasses. They rented costumes for us and I got a army surplus knit visor/cap. Plus, there were the dog tags...

100_3439.JPGLooks like the real deal eh? Well, they were created by someone in our props department and they went the extra step of stamping them so we had something to remember the experience. When the curtain came up, the first scene had me laying front and center on the stage with my ear to the floor listening for choppers. It might have looked like I was humping the stage because I was shaking so much. It was after all, my first time in the limelight. My part pretty much came off without a hitch other than one screw up. I had to exit stage left and then race around a maze of steps and hallways to be in the next scene having a fake chess game in the swamp with Ho John. I didn't make it, so Ho John just played a game by himself. There were no lines in that scene either so, no huge loss.  Both nights came out great, and it was over. We struck the sets, I took a few of the signs that were still up around the high school, and that was it. I was an ACTOR! *cough*

I tried to be in the next play. They were doing "Twelve Angry Jurors". I actually got selected to be juror #8 I think, which had maybe 5 lines. It was not a great role but I had the Jones. That was until, mom decided we were going to Florida the week the play was actually to be performed. Therefore I couldn't be in it.... so I had to resign which didn't make some of the members very happy. I don't think I did more than one or two dry reads of it when I found out, but the writing was on the wall. I may have tried out for another show but was quickly "not right for even for extra #3" or something, and that was it for my acting career. Lesson?  In radio, nobody could see your fat ass hump the stage. Yeah.  Junk Blog.

100_3709.JPGChannel 43 Plays Favorites! Channel 43.... Here comes the neat animated graphic for MASH. After a few highlights the announcer comes on while a little animated truck rolls along and a pair of lips on the side of the truck make a kiss with a *smooch".  7pm to 8pm while Mash was actually still on the air with new episodes. It replaced the Hogans Heroes hour which was top rated. It became the top rated show in local television for a few years.

Meanwhile the Cleveland Indians were played on Channel 43. So were the Cavaliers. This was at the dawn of cable TV  and many many years away before it swallowed up all the broadcast TV airings. Channel 43 had the games. Of course, that meant, MASH wouldn't play. It also meant the Indians didn't play. We had Municipal Stadium. It was a monstrous 70,000 seat house of pain. Other than the home opener which always sells out, the Indians of the 70's and 80's was lucky if they had 10,000 in the cavern of crap. Of course, on Sundays during foobah season, it was Browns Town. Dream crusher. Not housing champions since 1964.

100_3710.JPGNow, I wasn't old enough to drink, but the subliminal advertising for kiddies like me worked. When I was of "legal age", Busch beer was a cheap beer but it had more taste than the cheapest dreck out there. "Popular Priced" I believe was the moniker used. You could buy 40oz bottles of these for 95 cents at the local Revco drug store. Now, I'm not sure why they chose to adorn the other side of this butt comforter.  Maybe because it tastes like A**. I recall at the old broken down palace of tears, the official beer you could get was Genesee. It's a fine burp beer as well. Popular Priced. With who? Yes, we drank that stuff. I had a friend that liked their Cream Ale nick named "Genny Screamers". It didn't grow on me.

100_3712.JPGChannel 43 Plays Favorites! Then, Channel 19 WOIO went on the air and kicked their ass by playing movies pretty much without editing. My video tape of the Blues Brothers with commercials is pretty much the way the DVD came out. With swear words. They also played newer shows as well as better older shows. Ahh, but when the Indians were on Channel 43,  the old United Artists Cleveland outlet was on top. Why wanted to actually pay their pittance to drink watered down beverage when they could be seen at home?  Since the Indians were so "meh", they had a giveaway every weekend and various weekdays. My step father would take us to bat day. We'd have actual Louisville Sluggers which my brother would promptly break playing softball with them. Ahh, the other times we got freebees from the Indians, this was indeed one of them. Could you see them giving a BEER ADVERTISEMENT to an 12 year old nowadays? It was a Municipal Stadium SEAT CUSHION!  A man built this! It's vinyl covered foam!

100_3711.JPGI remember we did use these a few times when we went to the stadium. Likely they got left there and then trashed. I actually looked this up on the Bay and yes, you can buy one for $20! Wheeee, this junk blog is worth something! Of course, it's vinyl with foam inside so that means that it cant get the NERF EFFECT (pat pending). Nerf Effect is, when you pass gas, a really hideous waffles with syrup or cinnamon Life cereal or even Taco Bell bean burrito toot into a foam football...you'll smell it again for years...and years... 

Even keeping it in a box with a little mold didn't stay in the foam. This still smells like peanut shells and old Genny and crushed dreams. The old Municipal Stadium seats really needed some padding... Ask anyone that grabbed one when Modell took the Browns away from Cleveland....

Oh yeah, Opening Day 2016 at home at the JAKE, er, Progressive Field  is Monday April 4th at 4PM. GO TRIBE! Indian Fever...it starts from the very first inning!  I'll be sitting on my Nerf Effect resistant Channel 43 plays favorites Busch "Popular Priced" seating while rooting on my team. GO JOE CHAR-BON-EAU! GO JOE CHAR-BON-EAU!

-Ric

PS: As I live in Cleveland, we have something called winter. That thing called winter can sometimes F**K up plans. Every few years, it F**Ks up opening day. So, enjoy your iced beer and ice cream and $40 parking 2 days in a row. Now Tuesday, April 5th at 1PM. Est. temp at game time? 30-35 degrees....but likely SUNNY.

Cheap Copier

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100_3015.JPGI'm sure they still make this stuff, or maybe they don't? Sure they do. Hell, youngsters would say, "whazzit" and "howzzit"  and even think it was for wrapping foodstuffs. No, even in the 80's, when I couldn't afford a DIME for COPIES, I got me some PRIMO MEAD CARBON PAPER. Black gold as Klinger called it when he denied Major Winchester a few slices to do his taxes.

See, at one time, the "photostat" (a copy of something) was the thing of fairy tales for non commercial users. If we wanted a copy of something, while we were typing it on typewriters (keyboards not on a screen) we would have to double what we were writing with a piece of carbon paper and a second sheet in the "typewriter." Oh yeah, if you made a mistake and were lucky to have an erasable "ribbon" on your "typewriter" or even an eraser WHEEL or eraser PENCIL , it still meant that your "carbon copy" was going to have that error. Back in my day...

Of course, times changed. Personal copiers became affordable, but anybody with the need to maybe run 15 copies a year would be nuts to spend that $300-500 on a copier. Of course, there was always 10 cents at the local drug store to whip out a copy, but "Dimes worth of gas, up my ass" was the saying. I was a cheapdog.

100_3013.JPGI needed to make copies of a script I was writing for the show I worked on called "Under The Shelf". A few folks from the college radio station I worked for agreed to read my horrible scripts, so I wrote a parody of either "Quantum Leap" or "Peewee's Playhouse" or some other inane attempt to be funny and hip. Could I run down the street to Drug Mart or the post office or Office Max copy center to make the extra copies I needed? Nahhh. Cheapdog.

100_3011.JPGI can see what I done writted! It's my tried and true "parody within a parody" scripting technique. (Hack) Actually, this technique is popular now with all the fancy TV shows and cartoons so maybe I was a pioneer. I had written "Stephen and Elyese" from Family Ties a part within my Under The Shelf parody. It appears Alex liked eggs and came home from school sick? Comedy ensued.

Seriously though, this is the kind of stuff we went through to make a copy. You see copiers now that are few and far between since everybody just takes a picture of it and sends it out. Simpler times and dirtier fingers. Anybody need some low mileage "Black Gold"?

Arf! -Ricochet